The Grumpy Old Man Hates Dentists

It's not that I hate Dentists, the one that I see is a very nice man. I say man, he looks about 14 years old but he is probably in his late twenty's. It's not that I'm a big woosy or a cry baby, I just don't like people sticking needles into my gums and poking around with pieces of surgical steel in my little mouth.

As much as I dislike visiting not only the Dentist, but his fellow torturer the Dental Hygienist I have to endure and force myself to go and see these people on a regular basis, under pressure from my better half. I know that I should be good and be happy to visit them, but .....

So by now you probably realise that the time to visit these wonderful people has come around again. And to make matters worse, last night Sara gave me a chewy toffee and I love toffee's.

The Grumpy Old Fairy

We all know that the man of the house should be the "Man" of the house, but it dosn't always work out like that.

I like to think that, although I'm not the "as hard as nails" bloke that I used to be when I was a young lad in the army (well I did jump out of aeroplanes for a living). I still consider myself as "tough as old boots". That is until I'm ill.

Sara, my wife, who loves me very much (she must do to put up with me most of the time) tells me that I am like a big baby when I'm poorly. Well this time I tried to be a big brave soldier and carried on as if nothing was wrong with me.

It all started off on Monday, my birthday, just a little bit of a sickly feeling in the pit of my stomach by the time I was due to go to bed it had turned into a full blown dose of the trots.

Enter The Twilight Zone

How can this happen, when I went to bed last night I was 55 years old, and this morning I am 56, how !!!

I don't feel a year older, I don't look a year older, but I am. What strange forces are at work here, did I enter the Twilight Zone, or go through some time warp because when I go to bed at night I usually wake up the same age I was when I went to sleep.

These strange things have been happening to me all my life, at least once a year, usually on the 11th of September, I go to bed at night and when I wake up on the 12th I am a year older.

It's only a few years ago that I was a young man of 18. I still feel like I'm 18 most of the time. I still think that I can do the things that an 18 year old can do, then I look in the mirror or some kind person takes a photograph of me, and there he is, this Grumpy Old Man stood there in my house, surrounded by my family and wearing my clothes.